Free Beer Tomorrow. Chapter 1.

Now that I have your attention. Sorry for the cheap gag, but I’ve always wanted to do that. I want to talk about booze. I’m going to try and refrain from drinking while writing this. It may not work, but I will try anyway. So beer as we know it today has been through many years of changes and refinements. Here are a few random facts that I have heard/possibly remembered wrong.

Back in 1040 some monks made some beer. They still brew beer there today.
The US Army Veterans Association considers drinking more than one beer once a week alcoholism. I myself am not a Vet, but I would imagine seeing combat would lead most people to drink. More than one beer. Per week. Interesting fact especially in the wake of the attempt to lower the drinking age for soldiers.
All college kids drink light beer. When in fact all college kids drink is cheap beer. I will not take the time to explain this further. If that doesn’t make any sense to you, call me. I’ll stop the world so you can get off.
A night of drinking to much Guinness and Jägermeífter will make you vomit a pure black liquid that resembles a mid-weight motor oil. Don’t ask for details on quantity. I can’t remember.
All cheap beer tastes the same. They don’t all taste the same, but they do all taste cheap. I myself happen to enjoy the taste of cheap beer.
All Light/Lite beer tastes the same. Yet again, no. That being said, most of them still suck.
What the fuck was a Zima?

Yes, I know some of those aren’t facts. So what. I’m just bothered by the fact that drinking is always looked down upon by those who have never touched a drop. Now I’m not saying that they have to go get blitzed to understand alcohol, but look at history. Town meetings used to be held in Pubs. Beer was once safer to drink than water. We might actually be getting back to that soon. I would rather buy a case of beer than a case of water. I’m sure I’m not the only one. Personally, if it wasn’t for Irish Whiskey I would have never had a cup of coffee. So that is an exaggeration, but it is a large part of the reason why I drink coffee today. Mmm…Irish Whiskey. Sorry drifted off for a bit.
I understand all of the negative that surrounds alcohol today. I understand that drinking in higher quantity takes more responsibility, and or the ability to pass out before getting to the point where you are dancing on your neighbors lawn wearing nothing but a lamp shade singing New Kids on the Block songs. I guess my point is that alcohol itself isn’t the problem. You are.

Strow

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