To blow stuff way out of proportion is News. If you have been anywhere besides under a rock, you have probably heard, seen or read something about these following items:
- Rachael Ray
- A Black and White Scarf
- Dunkin’ Donuts
Listed separately, these items are about as harmful and imposing as a bunny with a loaded pillow. But mixed together with a coffee advertisement, Pamela Gellar and Michelle Malkin suddenly we have a Molotov Cocktail full of fail and jihad. Hey look. Rachael Ray is wearing a black and white scarf. She must be a terrorist. Dunkin’ Donuts must be promoting hatred. I don’t know about you, but last time I was in Dunkin’ Donuts I didn’t see things like this on the menu:
- Nuclear Arms
- Blood of the non believers
- Racism
- Hatred
Things I did see on the menu:
- Coffee
- Donuts
I guess we are now going to have to ban black and white scarves. Not that I even own a scarf…Wait a second, let me go double check that.
*Five minutes later.*
Nope, I don’t own a scarf.
I just demonstrated more fact checking skills and journalistic integrity in five minutes than most US news agencies. Back to the insanity at hand. Next up, we are going to have to suspend kids from school for wearing black and white scarves. Old ladies are going to get beat trying to grocery shop because their scarf might possibly resemble something that could somewhat/maybe be tied to some sort of terrorist type of clothing. Now I understand the power a symbol can carry. A swastika for instance. If you see somebody wearing a swastika on an article of clothing, you have a pretty good idea on where they stand. But that is the point. They are wearing a swastika. Not something that looks like or resembles a swastika. If I am standing in front of you and pointing my finger at you, and you are looking right at me, you can clearly see me pointing at you. Now if there is somebody fifty yards away, peeking through their blinds at an awkward angle behind me, they might see me giving you the finger. But I didn’t, so I’m not going to apologize for flipping you off. I should apologize for pointing at you, because that is also rude. Sorry. Moving on.
If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, it might just be a scarf. Or even a terrorist. Dunkin’ Donuts is in the business of selling coffee, not jihads. Jihads usually aren’t profitable. If you kill all of your enemies, you can’t sell them anymore coffee.
Strow