Things Your Guidance Counselor Didn’t Have the Balls to Tell You.

You will fail.
Someone will always be better than you.
You should be a janitor.
One day you will get drunk and wake up in a different country…and you will be missing vital organs.
You are a sucker.
You suck.
You suck at life.
You will get old. And die. Alone.
Not only do your peers hate you, but so does Jesus.
You will forget your grandkid’s names.
You will need to wear adult diapers. Not to drive from Texas to Florida to attack people, but because you will lose control of your bowels once your mind is shot.
You will never succeed.
STDs are a last option when trying to fake sick for work.
Your kids will be smarter and more successful than you.
Your kids will be retarded.
You are a wuss.
You’ll never be attractive.
You’ll never invent something useful.
You can not change the world.
You are an asshole.
Everyone thinks that you are a prick.
A dead baby could kick your ass.

I hope these demotivational statements help you wake up and realize that you are just as stupid and useless as the masses. That being said, it has worked for this long, so keep on trucking. You pathetic oxygen wasters.


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