Microsoft and the Zen Art of PR

Advertising has always been an outlet that I don’t fully understand. I get the basic concept of getting your name out there, but it’s the angle of attack that makes me scratch my head sometimes. I’m going to focus on Microsoft for a minute here. Let’s start out with their Mojave Experiment commercials. Attempting to trick people into using a product that everyone already hates is just stupid. On the that note, they have some guy in the commercial pointing out that people must not be using the OS properly. Hey assholes, it’s a graphical user interface. The whole entire point of your product is ease of use. If you need to teach people how to use it first, you might as well just sell a box full of FAIL. And to add to the misery, where in the hell does Jerry Sienfeld fit into this picture? Wait a second. This just in, the Sienfeld/Gates ads have already been pulled. Microsoft claims that it was all part of a bigger plan. Yeah right. Did their bigger plan include the masses ripping apart their expensive ads? Microsoft claims that they used the absurd ads to open a doorway to their “Life Without Walls” campaign. This brings me to my next point. Windows has to be the most appropriate name for their OS. I’m going to point out several parallels between actual windows and the OS of the same name.

Windows installed in a building or a house can provide a view to the world. On the other hand, if they are installed wrong they could leak, be drafty and plain old fall out and crash into the ground.
Windows installed on a PC can provide a user experience that can help you become more productive and connected to the world. On the other hand, if Windows is installed incorrectly, you will have problems installing other programs and the likely hood of random crashes.

Windows can easily be broken by no effort on your part. A baseball or an angry neighbor. You don’t even have to be home for your windows to break.
Windows can easily be broken by some random teenager with to much time on his hands. You don’t need to be using your computer to have someone hack it, it just needs to be on and connected to the internet.

A clean window can provided life giving sunlight to things like plants. A dirty window might as well just be a wall.
A clean and virus free version of windows can actually help you get shit done. A dirty, registry error prone, piece of crap can add to your stress level instead of dropping it.

In the interest of touching them all, I will conclude with a few words about Apple and some of the goofy shit they do. Apple’s advertising department gets it. Well most of the time. What does bother me is the animal named operating systems. If you stick with things like numbers, it’s very easy to recall the order. For instance, OS 9 and OS 10. Obviously 10 is the newer OS. But if I said OS Chicken, and OS Egg, you would immediately ask “Which one came first?” But I digress, although Mac’s are not as ever prone, and don’t have the same virus issues as PCs, they are still just machines that are prone to failure. I can crash a Mac at just about the same rate as I can crash a PC. And even before you try it…Yes. I am using them right. I have been building and working with computers of both types since 1995. We need to faces facts. Computer’s are not like jeans and other shit that you can buy based on a name brand. They are more like cars, you need to find one that fits you, your needs and doesn’t make people laugh at you while driving down the street. I will end my typical Monday tirade with this: Microsoft is trying to change their image because more people are using Macs. Microsoft should actually spend more time in R&D and then their wouldn’t be a need to change their image. And for all the Apple lovers that are happy the scales are tipping, just look at the situation before you get all excited. The Mac may be superior by design, but superior to an error prone pile shit isn’t saying much. I leave you to draw your own conclusions, and for me to contemplate which computer I will buy next.
Strow

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2 Responses to “Microsoft and the Zen Art of PR”


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