That was the thought that ran through my head as I was staring at a slab of rock lining the fire pit. The rock was about three inches away from my face. So now you know the end of the story. It gets better. The beginning and middle are just as good.
I am still a pyromaniac. I probably should have outgrown this years ago, but I don’t feel the need to grow up. Maturity has never been my strong suite. On the other hand, I’m usually not irresponsible. On this cold fall night, I was very, very irresponsible. I was attempting to adjust some rather large pieces of wood in the fire pit. After setting them in by hand I was trying to push a couple into the right spot with my foot. This progressed to pretty much standing on a log in the fire. Now don’t get me wrong. I understand how dumb that was. I also must state I have have done stupider things. I have jumped onto a burning palette in the same fire pit holding a knife and a beer. Why? Well, to pose for a a picture of course. I will admit it was stupid. I will also admit that it is dangerous. But most of all, it was fun. And the picture came out alright. Now when I was standing in the pit this time, a log slid, I slipped and fell. On the way to the ground I tried to miss as much of the fire as possible. This meant I was falling to the edge of the fire pit. Great, now I won’t burst into flames but I may smash my head on a rock. I put my hands out, catch myself and breathe a sigh of relief. I start to push myself back up when I realize that my right leg is getting pretty warm. Crap. I forgot about the fact that 2/3 of my body was still in the fire. I got up quickly, hopped out of the pit and made sure I wasn’t on fire. Mission accomplished. The fire has be stoked. I’m not burnt to a crisp. And somehow I didn’t crack my skull open. Sweet. That means it’s time for another beer.
I love going camping. For a vacation, it’s a lot of work. But camping in a spot where no one gets even a single bar on their phone makes it all worth it.
Sorry for the delay, I have a couple more good ones to come. I should be able to get them posted throughout this week.