Stoner Innovations

I should probably title this Stoner Innovation, but we’ll see where it goes.
So i was sitting in my kitchen trying to figure out what to eat when this thought popped into my head: What was that sandwich I used to make when I would get baked? I started to ponder the ingredients while I was staring into the fridge. I’m not sure how long this went on for, I just know that the fridge started staring back at me. Then I began to remember the items I would need to build the most fattening, best tasting sandwich I ever ate.
On the scientific side, I could make this sandwich and consume it stone cold sober and see if it was still the greatest thing ever. Now I realize that what I am about to make is astoundingly high in all of the things you should eat in moderation. F it, I’m going to make it anyway. This is no normal sandwich, it’s more like a dessert. You wouldn’t eat this for lunch. Or at least, probably shouldn’t eat it for lunch.
Yes, I am intentionally dragging this out. I want you to experience what I went through while trying to remember what went into constructing the best sandwich ever. So without further ado, here are the few items you will need. Bread, preferably white because of it’s lack of flavor. Peanut butter. Butter, that is at room temperature. Now you could stop there. It’s already fatty and tasty, but it could be better. Grab some chocolate syrup. Yes, I just made it more unhealthy. But it gets worse. Last, but not least. Grab a can of whipped cream. Now the amounts of the ingredients are really up to personal preference. You don’t need to use a lot of anything, you just need to balance the flavors to your own personal taste. Now once you have smothered all of this stuff between a couple slices of bread, pour yourself a glass of milk and chow down.
So I did eat this for lunch today. It was as good as I remembered. Chalk another on up on the board for the smokers.
For all of the non believers out there, I leave you with this quote from Bill Hicks.

“See, I think drugs have done some good things for us. I really do. And if you don’t think drugs have done good things for us, then do me a favor; go home tonight, take all your albums, all your tapes, all your CDs and burn’em. Because you know what? The musicians who made all that great music that has enhanced your lives throughout the years…Rrrrrreal fuckin’ high on drugs. The Beatles were so high they even let Ringo sing a few songs.”

So I guess I was able to point out more than one innovation. That’s a good thing. Because I wasn’t going to change the title either way.


2 Responses to “Stoner Innovations”

  1. 1 Headboy December 5, 2008 at 18:33

    hehe- stoner……wait…wha?

  2. 2 thesarabond December 12, 2008 at 16:47

    i confess. i am a writer. i believe i am pretty talented. i write my best when i am depressed. getting stoned enhances the emotion to a point where i become the world i am creating. and it’s as enjoyable for me to go there as it is for my readers. smoke on..

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